working wordsmith+happy husband+doting dad+amateur author+fledgling farceur+pretend prestidigitator+jolly hockeyologist

About Me

These pages will tell you all you want to know - and probably quite a bit that you don't, really - about me; who I am, a bit about my life, and the things I love the most.

My Books

These pages contain details of all the books I've published so far, including some reviews and details of where you can get hold of your very own copies, in paperbook or digital format.


I'm a firm believer that laughter is the best medicine, and these pages contain all sorts of bits and pieces which make me laugh, and which might make you smile a little bit, too.

I'm loving...

  • Being described as a "ninja" by an opposing striker during a hockey match in March 2017!
  • The first four reviews for Tales from the Toy Cupboard posted on Amazon all give my first children's book the top five-star rating!
  • The Alakazam Online Magic Academy - a fantastic way to teach tricks of the trade.
  • Working hard on my next full-length 'comedy' book.

I'm loathing...

  • The demise of my all-time favourite men's fragrance. And there I was, naively thinking that Jazz would never die. (I know it has now sneaked back, but as part of an over-priced 'Heritage' range, so I am not counting this!).
  • Having to wait until next year or even, I recently read to my horror, until 2019 for GoT series 8!
  • In terms of my aim of losing a stone and a half this year, I appear to have about two stone still to go.




Chart-toppers One Direction have gone their separate ways. How ironic.


I asked her: "How did you vote in the general election?". She said: "Angb". I replied: "That is 'bang', out of order."


There is chaos on the motorway today after a lorry laden with tonnes of Vick's Nasal Spray shed its load all over the carriageway. However, a police spokesman said they expect there to be no congestion for up to eight hours.


There are three types of people in the world: those who can count, and those who can't.


I tried to figure out what on earth prompted my sudden new-found love of ballet. The answer came to me when I put tu and tu together.


When my wife said she was thinking of leaving me, because of my new-found addiction for the 60s pop band The Monkees, I didn't think she meant it. "But then I saw her face..."


One of the positive things about insomnia? Just three more sleeps 'til Santa.

Buy my books! (Pleeeeeeeaase!!!!) Click the button below to go to my author spotlight page at

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© 2017 Darren Bane